rosebush ninja
by justallan
Summary: Emily has got the flu and has been locked in her room by the infamous Jenna Fitch. This looks like a job for NAOMI THE ROSEBUSH NINJA. A fluffy little one shot for you all.


'OW fucking rosebush,' I hear from my bedroom window, I smile knowing exactly who that could be at such an ungodly hour. I quickly scramble over Katie's unoccupied bed (probably out shagging David or Mark, I forget who it is after all it changes each week) to open the window letting the summer midnight breeze float into my room along with a lot of profanity. 'Fucking hell why the fuck would you have a sodding rose bush right under a mother fucking window,' I look down at a pissed off Naomi who hasn't notice me yet. She quickly glances up, her blue eyes illuminating in the moon light. 'I'm glad you find it funny that I've got a rose bush up my arse,' I snort trying to suppress my laughs.

'Shhh,' I hissed bringing a finger to my lips, 'they'll hear you,'

'Em I've been doing this every night for the pass week, I've spent my entire university fund on garibaldi's and have more scratches from this rose bush than a hour long cat fight, I think they might've noticed by now,' I just smile and stand back from the window. Suddenly a packet of garibaldi's and an electric kettle with a bag of green tea appeared on the window ledge followed by a pair of hypnotic blue eyes and a messy mop of blonde hair with various leaves and thorns tangled through it. Eventually Naomi got through the window at the sacrifice of Katie's array of jewelry and crap been thrown off the window ledge and Naomi's face being squashed against the floor after loosing balance. 'Seriously people with such long limbs where never meant to climb buildings,' she states while untangling herself from the array of tacky high street items that she seemed to have acquired from the window ledge. 'Well I'm glad you are the only exception,' I say as I helped her off the floor before letting her wrap her arms around me kissing my temple.

'It's only a rose bush after all. I've faced scarier things like one Katie Fitch,' I laughed giving her a playful slap. 'How you feeling?' she asked as she tucked a piece of hair from my face behind my ear revealing my bright red nose and the dark bangs that hung from my eyes as a result of sleepless flu ridden nights. 'A little better but still mum feels the need to trap me in here,'

'Well there are terrible things out there like these blonde monsters that go out hunting for little red heads to corrupt,' she joked as she started to mimic some sort of monster as she creeps around my room. I really can not help but laugh because the sight of the ice queen Campbell creeping round my room like some Scooby doo monster with twigs in her hair has me in stitches. 'yeah they creep out of their yellow houses at night and climb through red heads windows and before you know it BOOM!' she yelped before coming up behind quickly encasing me in her long arms in some attempt to scare me. 'You've been turned into a full blown muff munching lezzer,' she stated, we both spontaneously erupted into laughter. 'Are you sure that's the right way round?' I asked after my laughs had died down. 'Okay well maybe there's only one certain blonde that creeps out of her yellow house and only one certain redhead she looks for. But we all know who's the real corrupting monster here, I'm only doing this for the biscuits and the sex which by the way I've had yet to receive,' she pointed out giving me a fake little glare.

'Well you wouldn't want this would you, it is terribly catchy,' I say signaling to my flu face mess. 'Yeah well so is AIDS,' I laughed at the memory which seems like a lifetime ago considering how we were then, all unsure and quick glances with little tingling touches, and now it's completely different. We seriously can not get enough of each other and its best feeling in the world. She suddenly picks me up and twirls me around before laying me on my bed. 'Naomi?' I question while stroking her soft cheek. 'Yes?' she replies looking at me with adoring eyes which I am no doubt reciprocating. 'Why is there a kettle in my room?' she let out a short laugh and turned to the kettle that is balanced on the edge of the windowsill. 'Well this past week it seems my jumper has failed the task of bringing you your much desired green tea at the right temperature ,so I concluded the only way to bring your tea to you at the required temperature is to…'

'Make it here,' I finished.

'Ah two great minds think a like,' she replied before getting up to make some tea.

Hours passed and so did many cups of tea and a packet of garibaldi biscuits before I could feel my eyes lids beginning to droop and before I knew it I was falling into a peaceful sleep, nicely tangled within a certain blondes arms. Before I knew it I was waking up to the extra bright summer sun shine that filtered it's way through the bedroom. I was sad to find no blonde beauty but a note in her place.

_Mama Fitch was doing her nightly check had to dash. Same time tonight : ) Don't worry I'll bring the kettle ; ) _

_Naomes xxxxx_

I felt a smile suddenly erupt across my face until I heard some shouting downstairs. 'They've done it again Rob. Look at it, look what they've done to my rose bush!'

The smile suddenly comes back. Naomi Campbell, long limbed rosebush ninja. 


End file.
